headaches, hugging and paintin away!!!!
Posted by lizzy Grover on Sunday, May 29, 2011
So I woke up this morning with a headache the size of Rhode Island. Wait...thats a smaller state isn't it? Ok, Texas. Got up to start getting ready for meeting and piled right back in bed when my meds didnt work. I hate that. I never used to get headaches, ever. The only two I ever got where the two times I broke my noes. Those were duzzies! And the reason my sunglasses still sit crooked no my face.
Now thank goodness my pills are starting to work. Headaches make me feel like such a bum. I couldn't get to meeting but NOW my pills are working so I'm up and around. Im so sorry Jehovah. I feel like I should have just gritted my teeth and gone. I need to go paint a room tonight, A ceiling actually. And some more trim, I think there might be a door or two to paint as well. Looking forward to it. My kids are still gone and I like the distractions when they are away. I get overwhelmed sometimes during the week and cant wait till Saturday so I can have a ME day. But than that day comes and I have to keep my self oober busy because I just feel like a pile when they arent around. I miss their little giggly faces. Purdees loud booming voice asking all sorts of questions and listening to her in the corner with her little odds and ends playing with her huge imagination. and Linkon bonkin around like a dump truck smiling from ear to ear. Kid never stops smiling. Even if he is sick or hurt he still smiles. And hugs a lot. I love hugs. You can never ever ever get to many hugs. Unless they are from the creepy guy at the party or at meeting who hugs to often and to long.
My poor mom. She has been down lately about Leah. Well, we all have. Comes and goes in waves. I am forever changed because of Leah dying and she was just my sister. I cant imagine losing a child. I would never ever be ok again. Jehovah is like that rock that keeps you going. Knowing He is there and that He truly understands what you are going though. Especially losing his own son. But to see my mom go through this pain hurts more than anything I have ever gone through....and my epidural didnt work with Linkon....so i know pain!!!!! To see the sisters in our hall take care of her makes my heart melt. She feels like she is being to emotional or a burden has even had some say she needs to move on, its been a year. Creep!!! But how do you do that? A child is so apart of you. All the people who have stepped up to take care of mom are so kind and loving. I love them all so much more for their love. If you are kind to one in my family you are family in my book. You dont ever move on when someone you love dies. you move forward in life. But not on. Its this huge thing inside you. At the back of everything that happens big or small, happy or not, is the realization that Leah missed it. I've even thought about never getting married again. Because Leah wouldn't be there. I dont know if thats something I could do. Not that suitors are lining up anyway so I think I'm good but you get my point.
Ok, off sad subjects time to get my ipod and go paint the crap out of a room or two!! Love everyone.....and to those who read this and love my mom. I love you and thank you. Please dont ever stop huggin her. Your the rocks she needs more than you know.
Now thank goodness my pills are starting to work. Headaches make me feel like such a bum. I couldn't get to meeting but NOW my pills are working so I'm up and around. Im so sorry Jehovah. I feel like I should have just gritted my teeth and gone. I need to go paint a room tonight, A ceiling actually. And some more trim, I think there might be a door or two to paint as well. Looking forward to it. My kids are still gone and I like the distractions when they are away. I get overwhelmed sometimes during the week and cant wait till Saturday so I can have a ME day. But than that day comes and I have to keep my self oober busy because I just feel like a pile when they arent around. I miss their little giggly faces. Purdees loud booming voice asking all sorts of questions and listening to her in the corner with her little odds and ends playing with her huge imagination. and Linkon bonkin around like a dump truck smiling from ear to ear. Kid never stops smiling. Even if he is sick or hurt he still smiles. And hugs a lot. I love hugs. You can never ever ever get to many hugs. Unless they are from the creepy guy at the party or at meeting who hugs to often and to long.
My poor mom. She has been down lately about Leah. Well, we all have. Comes and goes in waves. I am forever changed because of Leah dying and she was just my sister. I cant imagine losing a child. I would never ever be ok again. Jehovah is like that rock that keeps you going. Knowing He is there and that He truly understands what you are going though. Especially losing his own son. But to see my mom go through this pain hurts more than anything I have ever gone through....and my epidural didnt work with Linkon....so i know pain!!!!! To see the sisters in our hall take care of her makes my heart melt. She feels like she is being to emotional or a burden has even had some say she needs to move on, its been a year. Creep!!! But how do you do that? A child is so apart of you. All the people who have stepped up to take care of mom are so kind and loving. I love them all so much more for their love. If you are kind to one in my family you are family in my book. You dont ever move on when someone you love dies. you move forward in life. But not on. Its this huge thing inside you. At the back of everything that happens big or small, happy or not, is the realization that Leah missed it. I've even thought about never getting married again. Because Leah wouldn't be there. I dont know if thats something I could do. Not that suitors are lining up anyway so I think I'm good but you get my point.
Ok, off sad subjects time to get my ipod and go paint the crap out of a room or two!! Love everyone.....and to those who read this and love my mom. I love you and thank you. Please dont ever stop huggin her. Your the rocks she needs more than you know.